Sometimes the bad days just sneak up on you. You are doing great, feeling good about things, feeling almost optimistic. Then things just come out of nowhere. Two Facebook status updates in a row announcing pregnancies. Yet another success story after the first round of Clomid. Another successful IVF #1 for someone on the boards. Someone else who stopped trying and then got that surprise BFP. It all comes at once.
That’s how it’s supposed to work, isn’t it? You get pregnant with your husband when the time is right. You aren’t afraid to tell people publicly because you don’t know how much can go wrong. Or you have some trouble, but all you need is some help ovulating, because you actually have a diagnosis. The doctors know how to fix you! Or even if they don’t, at least there is IVF, which works for everyone, right? But if you aren’t ready for that, well sometimes all it takes is to stop trying. And sure when you are 25 you can take a few years off and try on your own. But when you are 36, you have no diagnosis, you feel like you have no control over anything… that’s when the bad days come.
Or maybe it is because I haven’t seen the sun in weeks. That tends to bring the bad days too. I seriously need a vacation. Or a baby. Is it too much to ask for both?