Now that we have an actual date for our ET, it’s starting to feel a bit more real. I’m still on estrogen, 2 mg twice a day. That suppresses my ovaries so I won’t ovulate on my own. In about a week I will add a 3rd pill, which acts to get the uterine lining nice a thick. On 4/5 I have a monitoring appointment. They will make sure I haven’t ovulated and make sure my lining looks ready. This is where we ran into trouble last time. The lining was only 8 mm, which is good, but not great. We got it up to 10 mm in time for the transfer, but this is the only thing that can delay transfer. So we will see…
Once things look ready, I will start progesterone to make the lining “sitcky” and ready for the embryo. This time it will be intramuscular injections of progesterone in oil (aka PIO). There is no evidence that this is any better that the progesterone suppositories we used for the last two cycles. In fact, a recent study suggests that the Crinone gel actually works better. But given that I have had two chemical pregnancies with Crinone, we are going to mix it up and try PIO this time. Luckily one of my internet friends had some extra that she sent me, saving me $300. Thus I am spending $0 on medications for this cycle. Yay! The transfer day is 4/12. Three weeks to go!
We decided to transfer the 2 embryos frozen together: 4BB and 4AC. Our doctor offered to thaw and transfer all three, which we decided against. I would like to avoid multiples if we can. Transferring three scares me. Transferring two makes me nervous, but doesn’t scare me. And this way we will have one good embryo left, so if this cycle does work we could try for a sibling in a few years with our last embryo.
With the last FET, I was not ready. I was still upset over our failed IVF. I was worried about the job I was about to accept. I hated that I hadn’t been running and felt out of shape. It was dark, and cold and I really seem to struggle with the darkness in the winter. I’m trying to approach this FET with a more positive attitude. So what am I doing to achieve this positive attitude?
1) I’m running. Not a lot, thanks to what I think might be a stress fracture of my foot, but I’m getting out. Yesterday I actually walked for a few miles and it felt great. That is something I can keep doing even after transfer and not worry about knocking the embryo loose (yes, I know that doesn’t happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t worry about it!).
2) I’m working on getting my muscle tone back. I miss having abdominal muscles. I actually thought about rowing again. I think about this every spring since I can see the lake from my office and I really really miss being on the water. I’m just not sure I really miss rowing. But I decided that can wait. For now I will just try to regain some muscle tone with occasional trips to the gym.
3) Meditation. I have some CDs I got from a friend (who got them from another friend) for IVF cycles. I’m trying to listen to them while walking, which isn’t your typical meditation time, but for me I need to be outside in order to relax. Being inside makes me antsy, like there is something else I should be doing, so I find it hard to relax.
4) My office is organized. This really doesn’t have anything to do with IVF/FET. It’s just something that has been bugging me for months. Now it is done, and I feel better.
5) We have an IVF on the schedule for June in case we need it. I wouldn’t be able to handle a failed FET if I didn’t know we had another shot at IVF this year. We do have that chance thanks to my wonderful nurse who agreed to put me on the schedule even though we were still 2 months away from our FET at the time. I love that they understand my neuroses at this clinic and are willing to work with me.
I feel so much better going forward with this than I did last time. I’m trying to be optimistic, but I am worried. It hasn’t worked with the best embryos we had. It doesn’t seem likely that lower quality embryos will fare better. But then again, I’ve always been a big fan of the underdog so let’s hope we’ve got some determined embryos hanging out in the freezer.